I have been not wanting to come and post. I think and feel like I have not wanted to explore (and still uncertain) about what I have going on within. I don’t feel strong enough to feel it all. To open to it all. To go within and hang with what is occurring there.
My cells are swimming in overwhelm. It is not so easy for me to connect to my instinct, calm and vulnerability. My soul is not as loud as I have known it to be.
I know it is right here with the beat of my heart and my breath. And there is a spasticity that muddies the connection.
Oh boy. Oh Boy. OH BOY.
I have a small ulcer on one finger that makes it a bit difficult to type. There is a shiver flowing through my body.
It is my belief that most of our brains are not caught up with technology and the world wide connection of information that is now allotted and available to us.
I have never been more aware of the heartache and destruction; the anger and the hurt; the chaos and the mess that is.
It is an extreme ‘trip’ that I have not been and am not comfortable with. It is said that we grow outside of our comfort zone. I’d like to take a holiday from growing. I’d like to take a vacation staying within my comfort zone. Exploration and depth can come from being comfortable.
Many places I have traveled, I have allowed myself more freedom to just live each moment doing whatever feels best in each moment. Turn/Tune into what is in front of me through my own loving innate desires. Turn off/Tune out what I have no control of and what is not mine to carry. Perhaps, many of us are carrying too much of what is not meant for us to carry and/or even give our energy to.
I wish this for whoever wishes this for themselves. I’d like to support each other in this. We can still care but in a way that lets each other choose for ourselves what is best for us and not what I/we think is best for another.
It is wonderful to actually look and see the ‘elephant in the room’. It is exciting seeing the ‘dirt that is underneath the rug’. It isn’t often easy. It can often be unfun. It is time. It is time for us all to be true to all that is human in a most humane way – safe vulnerability.
May our lives be full of humanity and as humane and beautiful as we could possibly open to.
This is the world I believe is being created. If you can/want to find a version of a new way of us all being in the world, now at this time; individually, together through love and support, may you really feel it and invite all of your cells to fill up with this belief. Perhaps, explore, dive in, dive through and create a wonderful world through your own comfortableness.
Miracles happen everyday. You are a miracle. May you let the miracle of your love beautifully burst open. Oh, the brightness of your love.
